Why Old People Are Cranky

In 1997 I was diagnosed with a non-reversible back condition. Of course, I was way too busy then to deal with it....and did not follow the advice of the doctor and follow through with pain management. (another term for "take a pill"). I was way to busy with work and kids....and I have just dealt with the pain. Some days are better than others and I have just adjusted to the pain. Well, as luck would have it....this last few weeks, there are more "other" days, than "better" days. Hoping each day that I wake that it will be better.........NOT. I am a busy woman with the most precious gifts that one could have. Grandchildren. Might I say....GRAND?
And of course, I have my little 10 year old gift, that I cannot imagine life without. Recently I found myself saying "I'm sorry, Grandma cannot get down on the floor and play", "I'm sorry, Grandma cannot give you a piggy back ride down the stairs". And that really sucks. Out right sucks. How can this be?
So a couple of nights ago, my beautiful son overheard his dad and I in the bathroom. I was crying.....Trying to keep my secret of my pain from my children has been difficult this last few weeks. My son approached me last night asking that I go to the doctor. It made me cry at the thought that he cares so much. And of course, him just being himself, "mom, you need to go to the doctor, you have to have something for the pain. We want you to be around for the kids."
So I promised him that I would. And I did. Just got back and low and behold, after a battery of x-rays.......... Dr. Ed enters the room and says, "You have the lower spine of at least a seventy year old"....I responded with, " You know Dr. Ed, that is the second beautiful compliment that I have received today"...."the first would have been my two year old grandson walking in the bathroom as I was exiting the tub, and he asked if Grandma has a baby in her belly too"!!!!!
Of course, to me, it was funny. And the truth be told....right now I have no pain. None. Between the shot and the prescription......I feel numb. Something that I could never have experienced in 1997........I was just way too busy.
I have decided that I was just way to cranky with the pain. And after I left the doctor this afternoon, it dawned on me that "OLD PEOPLE ARE CRANKY BECAUSE THEY HURT"!!!!
I know now that the pain made me less tolerable of people.......and I was testy. I am not that person as a rule and no longer want to be cranky....I will from this day forward..."take a pill"!!!
Good day to all............

She Calls Herself Spot

Spot's mother was a beautiful dark haired beauty. However, by the time Spot arrived, the mother had a previous child. A son, two years older than Spot. No one is really sure as who the father of these children are...except, that they are not the same man. Oh no, the beautiful woman had a difficult time staying with one man.....I'm certain that her motto was "I'll spread on the bed". The son was being raised by the bio grandmother. However, Spot was two years old now....and obviously too old to be cute any longer.....so let's off her, and move on to another man and have another child. All the while Spot is bouncing in foster care because the mother's idea of offing Spot would be by asking someone to watch Spot for an hour and never returning.
Of course, eventually Spot would be adopted by a family that needed another tax break.

I Was Looking Forward To A New Week!!!

I was looking forward to a new week until it happened. I woke up and it is Monday, May 18th. I spent most of yesterday trying to forget last week.......and it has started all over again. And I guess to be truthful, last week has just not ended. So technically, am I still in last week, or am I in a new week? I'm no longer sure.

Let's start with Friday....my 10 year old stole $1.00 from me.....why, one might ask? If I had the answer.......stealing $1.00 or $1,000.00.....there is no difference for me. Of course of Thursday she stole a balloon at school, and I received a call from the school....My punishment for her would be as follows: Sit on your hands as a reminder not to use them to take something that doesn't belong to you. However, on Friday, I received a call from the teacher letting me know that my form of punishment was not acceptable because it can cut off the blood flow to her hands. Of course the entire time the teacher was talking, I was thinking that my daughter was lucky that I hadn't cut off the blood flow to her entire body.

Saturday evening....time for bed. At which time she projectile vomits everywhere. No fever, no additional nausea. Hmmmmmmmmm. After the mess was cleaned and carpets shampooed, I went to the restroom and found a sticker that read: DO NOT EAT..DO NOT EAT...DO NOT EAT....in three different languages. So as I touched it to pick it up, I find that the sticker is moist. I asked my daughter if she had put this in her mouth.....and she replied yes. Of course, the next half hour on the phone with poison control and "ask a nurse". Turns out that a pair of shoes that had been purchased had this sticker on them. Stickers are now used instead of the little packet of silicone beads.........And yes, can and will produce projectile vomiting. And because she did not eat the sticker...she should be fine after vomiting. Keep her up for a couple of hours to monitor her breathing. blah blah blah....Like I wanted to be with her for additional time. Almost every minute of every day, I have to remind myself....she is autistic. And the truth be told...I know that I am fortunate that she is high functioning...but dear God.....the sticker had been placed in the garbage. Yuck!!

The Sunday rolled around. And the offspring of my husband wanted to spend time over here. You know, just Daddy & me time. Whatever!!! Freak!!! In one weeks time, she has gotten rid of the retard.........and decided that she is a lesbian. Yes, a lesbian. You know, I have no problem with people having different sexual identities.....however, with her.......it just makes me nauseous. I could be wrong, but I believe that you are born with your identity. It doesn't just flip flop in a weeks time....and again, I could be wrong. I spent the day in my room during her visit. Although, I did try to make conversation....and it was rejected. Guess I'm not her type!!

This morning, now Monday, should have, could have been a little better.....but NO. By 7:30 a.m., I have a 10 year old, 6 year old, and 2 1/2 year old all fed and dressed for the day. Hair brushed, teeth brushed, beds made, dishes done and it's looking good!!!!

At 8:30, I have dropped off a 10 year old and 6 year old at school. I decided to treat myself to a Starbucks!!!! Oh yes, a hot carmel cappacinno. It was wonderful. The 2 1/2 year old in front of the television having his 2nd breakfast of tater tots. Then, the phone rang and it was the school. Letting me know that the 6 year old was throwing up. I'm on my way. I get him picked up and delivered back home....It is now 1:16 and the poor baby has thrown up atleast 6 to 7 times...all gingerale of course. And then with the most pathetic look on his face....crying he says...Grandma, I thought I had to toot....and now there is poop all over me. I respond to him...."that's okay baby, no one has to know...this is what Grandma's do, hurry up and take your clothes off, and I will run a bath and wash your clothes and have them clean before anyone else comes home".

I hug him tightly, wanting to gag and vomit myself........when I realize that I really love this child. However, ISABELLA, six year olds do not poop, the shit.

Please keep in mind that while this vomit/poop event is going on....I am also meeting the needs of the 2 1/2 year old......by the way, he shit's too. He no longer poopies!!!

So laundry is going....2 1/2 year old down for a nap...and six year old laying on the floor in the bathroom so he is near the toilet. Because, Grandma has limited over the counter medication to make him feel better.......But, I will be prepared by this evening. Trust me, I will be at Walgreens purchasing one of everything!!

Hope you have a nice day!!!!!!!!! Because the above mentioned is probably the best part of my day!!!

Til' next time...................

Autism and A Ten Year Old!!!!!

Autism is a crazy, bizarre, nearly unbearable syndrome. We have a beautiful, wonderful grand-daughter that we have raised from three weeks of age to current. She is now ten...although, funny, witty, always smiling....life is one big CHERRY, for her. As a high functioning academic autistic child....I know that she will be the death of me. She is normally an A/B student....however, the last six weeks she dropped to C/D student. Although, according to her mid-term report: she has excellent work ethic. HELLO????? Upon speaking with the teacher, I find that my daughter has decided that it is Spring, and she has decided that she no longer wants homework....and she doesn't bring it home, and/or rushes through her work and gives any answer. Examples of why I will die soon:

1. Saying goodnight to her and giving her a hug and kiss results in: feeling odd objects in her pajamas. At which time I ask, "what is in your panties". Her response: "Cookies"
Damn, Oreo cookies shoved into the waist band of her panties...

2. Finding hair in the bathroom that once was on her beautiful head. As if, cutting off 26 inches of hair for donation to Locks of Love, this pass December wasn't enough hair to cut. She continues cutting her hair. All of her dolls have received hair cuts....And I know that you are thinking that I shouldn't leave the scissors down. And trust me, I DON'T. She is now using her brother's beard trimmer to cut hair.

3. Noticing that someone, (not I) has been in my make-up. Asking her about this...results in:
"No mommy, I would never get into your make-up".........hmmmmmmmmm...As I am standing there looking at the eye shadow that was mistaken for lipstick.....

4. So now before bed, I have to frisk her.....like a common criminal. And the real kicker would be....she is ready for bed. I ask, "honey, do you have anything in your panties that is not suppose to be there".....her response, "no mommy, I know better than that after I had the cookies in my panties"....I smile, give her a kiss, hug her and then frisk her...and what do I find?
Two big yellow lemon heads..you know the size of a jaw breaker? Of course, first I think what in God's name has happened? Then , I think...what next?

I'm sorry, I can not continue this..........but this would be a small example of between 10-25 issues a day with her...from pouring out shampoo, conditioner, body wash, lotions, etc., to asking 25 questions on the 1 1/2 mile drive to school....and before I can answer one, the next one is asked.....I find myself dreaming of duct tape....(just kidding), super glue will work just fine.

And at the end of the day, I ask for strength to do it all over again and survive!!! And for so many years, I thought for certain that my middle son would be the death of me.

That is all for today folks!!!!!!!Tomorrow is an another story........well, actually, she will be out of school in three hours.......so technically, this afternoon is another story....it just hasn't arrived yet.

How In God's Name Did I Get This????????

Okay, let's start with saying that my husband whom I love dearly, had a child with a woman before I met him. And I am not even sure that child is a true term in this case. Freak, Freak of Nature. Thank God I have not only had my tubes tied, cut and burnt......I am considering removing any and every organ that could assist in creating another Freak of Nature. I wonder from time to time....was it something in the water? Could it be that blood passing through her veins is really my husbands? Did the cunt he was married to before me, cheat on him? I don't have the answer, but what I encountered yesterday goes as follows:

First let me say that this 17 year old communicates with me via e-mail. We are not only in the same house...but same room when this happens.
Yesterday when she got off of the bus, much to my surprise she had someone with her. As I was trying to adjust my eyes to figure out what in the hell I was seeing...it came to me. Forest Gump had a younger brother whom was retarded. Obviously, they did not show that in the movie...it is only my assumption. But here he was...FOREST GUMPS RETARDED FUCKING BROTHER!!!!!
I probably would have handled the entire situation differently, had they not been practically fucking from the walk from the bus to MY HOUSE. For all of my neighbors to see. Upon arriving to my vehicle....this 6 foot tall, and I am only guessing 300-325 pound retard, begins to climb into the back seat of my itsy bitsy pick up truck. At which time my husbands daughter says, "Weeee waaannnt yooouuu to droooop us ooofff at Smith's and weeeee willlll waaalllk hooome". I replied with, "will you be joining us for dinner"? And her response was, "yeeaahhh and heeee is huunnggry". I respond with, "Dinner will be at 5:30". And by the way, were you needing great assistance crossing the street or was that a public display of affection. She responded with, "Weeee are daaattting".
Each time I looked in the rear view mirror...all I could see is this huge fucking head. I couldn't drive fast enough to get them out of the vehicle. Besides there was this awful odor...like a funk smell, which later I found out what it was.
As 5:30 was approaching...I took four xanax...and thought it would help with dealing with having the difficult task of having to look at not one but two extreme creepy looking people. Of course, I had lost my appetite...and my husband ended up working late. At which time I called him and told him that I hate his guts!!!!
I made it through dinner....and then I thought I would grill him. First of all he is mexican, and in his home they have geese, RUNNING THROUGH THE HOUSE, ducks, RUNNING THROUGH THE HOUSE, farrets, RUNNING THROUGH THE HOUSE, four cats, six dogs ALL RUNNING THROUGH THE HOUSE. That is when it hit me...he smells like funk because his house smells like funk. The only thing that was missing and he may have left it out on purpose would be a couple of fucking pigs. I mean with the "swine flu" going around I can only imagine he might leave that out. Needless to say, I was not the best host. Before, during and after dinner I was spraying LYSOL. I felt it necessary to protect my family from not only the funk smell...but the possibility of swine flue. Dear Woman in the Raw....do you remember the bobble head girl that I hired a few years back? And it was necessary to let her go shortly after hiring? Then you must know that her head was small in comparrison to this guy's flipping head.
As soon as he was picked up by his father....my husbands daughter found it necessary to contact some freak that she has met on myspace...age 24, drinking and drugs are his primary activities. And for some sneaky reason....she thought that I would not find out. So in the last twenty four hours I have been lied to....her father has been lied to, and I am awaiting my husbands arrival to approach this girl.
As most people know, I have been compared to a human lie detector....hahaha
Hell to pay this evening....looking forward to shutting down her myspace page and she will no longer have internet access.....I am even more looking forward to her turning 18 and getting the fuck out of my life. NOT MY CHILD...NOT MY PROBLEM...I WANT IT GONE!!!!!!!!!!

Other than that it has been a very productive day...I long for a Saturday that I can say..."I did absolutely nothing today and loved every minute of it"!!!!!!!!

Toodles for now....I'm sure more to follow later..........

Idiot's Are Near

Do you ever get the vibe that idiot's are near? Well I must have idiot radar. And the truth be told, I must have an idiot magnet attached somewhere in the rolls of fat and I can't see it. Driving through McDonalds to pick up breakfast for my daughter-in-law and favorite son it happened. I ordered four sausage burritos and two hashbrowns....when the idiot on the other end of the speaker wanted to know if I wanted the burritos and hashbrowns from the "dollar menu" or the regular menu. I asked the person what is the difference between the burrito on the dollar menu or the $2.49 burrito. When out of the speaker box I hear "there is no difference mam". IDIOT IDIOT IDIOT.....So I replied, "of course I want the burrito's for $2.49....because I want to spend more money. She says, "really?"....."No I want the burrito's from the dollar menu, thank you. Hoping that I was going to see a teenage kid at the window...I was shocked to see someone my age......that fucking dumb!!
Regarding the daughter-in-law I did not want......and could live the rest of my life without seeing this tattoed, cut up freak of nature. She must have been dropped or her mother did an awful lot of drugs or drinking because she is so dumb that she could have been the person on the "other end of the speaker". My least favorite son is equally as dumb due to the fact that neither of them have jobs....he gets her knocked up. And expects everyone to pay the tab. Wake the fuck up!!! He now knows that as long as he is not working that I will not help him one bit. Let Welfare cover their asses. I know that it sounds wrong of me...but I am numb to any emotion for the two of them. Oh and did I mention that they have enough money for weed...but not for rent or food?
I can only hope that both of them get some sense before this child is born in October.
Speaking of idiots........there is son #1.....who is now 32....The ugly bimbo that he is hooked up with has got to be the biggest IDIOT of all. The person she should not piss off is me. She has managed to do it.....this is the last time. Because her being the stand up, good Catholic girl that she professes to be........just isn't cutting it for me. To date, I know for a fact, that she is living in sin, drinks, smokes, lies and worst of all is taking up precious air that should be reserved for someone who loves my son. Son #1 really needs to grow a set.....or retrieve his from her purse.
I even told her that the reason she couldn't get pregnant is because she has such a tight hold on his nuts that no sperm can travel through. I thought I taught him better than that.......
Maybe this is a reflection of my parenting, I don't know. But I was certain that I taught those
two boys better than to be a low life or to be yanked so hard they become stupid.
I have yet to have dick that made me lose my ever loving mind. So it is hard for me to understand.
Well, this is my post for today.....although, it is early so I could be back.